


Rain/Fall

by Loth-Cat (Starbird)



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars: Rebellion Era - All Media Types, Star Wars: Rebels
Genre: But I deleted it, But if that’s a thing for you it’s cool don’t read, Double Entendres, Drunk Sex, Enthusiastic Consent, F/M, Fluff and Humor, Hera and Kanan are mooning about in this btw, Humor, I did have a 50th work before, I was feeling super cheeky when I wrote this, It’s also pretty mature, Like children, My 50th work on AO3!, No angst unless you count Sabine’s mortification from her uh, Oh No He's Hot, Sabine and Ezra troll each other MERCILESSLY in front of the fam, The booth ships it, The equivalent of two children closing their eyes and slapping at each other, The most petty stupid fight ever, This gets kinda cracky, This quickly devolved into crackfic, Totally In Love, Trying to get off to a good start in 2021, Very Public Walk of Shame, Well - Freeform, With Consent Okay Peeps, anyway..., kanera - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-05
Updated: 2021-02-03
Packaged: 2021-03-15 23:34:04
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 10,063
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28572327
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Starbird/pseuds/Loth-Cat
Summary: Caught in a rainstorm while resupplying on a remote planet, Ezra and Sabine find themselves accidentally falling into bed together after a night at a bar. When realization comes in the morning, they are forced to work things out -- but not until after a surprise mission, where they don't have a chance to talk about things just yet.
Relationships: Ezra Bridger/Sabine Wren, Kanan Jarrus/Hera Syndulla
Comments: 88
Kudos: 127





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hey friends. I REALLY wanted to hold off and only start posting this once I had finished it, but it’s almost 8000 words now and still not completed. I had it planned out as a 3-chapter story – the event, a mission where they don’t have a chance to communicate, and the resolution. But little extra scenes have popped up here and there (such as their humiliating walk of shame through the inn the morning after) and them mercilessly trolling each other, and this turning more and more cracky, and well, I just kept not being able to wrap it up. I know I have a real problem with finishing stories, and honestly I’m not going to apologize for it because that’s an ADHD thing, and in the last year I’ve become more aware of my ADHD and the insidious effect it’s had on my life and relationships and the immense pain it’s caused, all these things I didn’t know it was doing in my life, and I am doing my best to work on it. I will do my very, very best to complete this, but major depression plays a role, too, so I can't always get things done. There's also all my medical issues on top of it, plus I have an extremely stressful family life as well. Thanks for bearing with me and supporting me. ❤️ I know I still owe replies to comments. I will get to them.
> 
> But on a FUN note, because I am not all doom and gloom: This is a FUN piece. As I said in the tags, it quickly devolved into CRACK, and it's just really fun and goofy, and I hope you really enjoy it and laugh and have fun with it. We all need some fun and light after last year, huh? Peace, love, and light to all of you. 💕

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you want to picture this inn, think of an inn from The Elder Scrolls: Oblivion. That is this inn. LOL.
> 
> **NOTE 1/10/21** Expanded this chapter!!

Abindi was thoroughly and unconcernedly neutral, and given its remote location, lack of profitable resources, and apathy, the Empire had left it entirely alone. No one would know the Spectres’ names, much less care even if they did. Sure, there was always the off chance of recognition, but odds were low, even for a betting sentient.

“This was one of my best finds,” Kanan had gloated, even though everyone knew it was Rex’s secret that he’d shared with the crew shortly after joining the fledgling Rebellion. _Nice little stopover,_ he’d told the Rebels. _Always willing to help an offworlder with some decent supplies._

Hera, in return, had arched a brow, looking unamused. She, along with everyone else, knew exactly where this particular gem had come from. “Oh, yeah. You’re a great treasure hunter.”

Ezra and Sabine had scouted the small city they’d landed in first, just to be sure, reporting back that it was slow and quiet. The crew spent the afternoon stocking up on supplies, then turned toward the priority of dinner. They were a mismatched band of people, but no one on Abindi gave them a second look. No one on Abindi cared.

After the meal, Hera and Kanan said they were returning to the _Ghost_. Chopper went with them to recharge, and Zeb said he was going to see if he could find any trouble that needed attending to. Ezra and Sabine stood outside the restaurant as the group broke up, undecided. A cold wind blew, telling of a coming rainstorm. Dark clouds began to move in.

Ezra watched the clouds gather overhead. “Definitely going to rain,” he commented, never one to miss a chance to state the obvious.

“Wow, genius,” Sabine replied. “They should clone you.”

Ezra lowered his head and kicked the sidewalk with the toe of his boot. His cheeks showed a tinge of pink, and Sabine’s brows constricted for a quick second – she never knew what would embarrass him or offend him or hurt his ego. “Shut up,” he muttered.

Hera had given them the night off. Radar showed that the storm was going to be a bad one, and they either had to leave right now or stay on-planet till the morning. The crew had nowhere to be right now, so everyone was on their own.

 _Bet I know what Hera and Kanan are up to,_ Sabine thought. Zeb had _very_ conspicuously avoided going back to the ship, and Chopper made it clear he was powering down. Sabine and Ezra had lingered over dinner, not out of a desire to spend private time with each other – though that was rare and always nice – but because they didn’t want to make up an awkward excuse to get out of Hera and Kanan’s presence.

Across the way and a few doors down, music escaped a building, and a buzzing sign announced that it was a bar. Sabine nodded toward it. “Let’s go there.”

Ezra’s brows dipped down for a moment when he saw what she was talking about. “A _bar_?” he questioned. _“Sabine,”_ he then added, as if utterly scandalized.

“What?” she returned casually, folding her arms across her chest. “You not up for it, Bridger? I know you’re dull and all, but – ”

“Hey,” he bristled. “I’m always up for a good time. But – ” At her snort, he cut himself off.

“Yeah, you sure are a party animal. You and my six-year-old cousin both. Long as you’re both in bed snuggled down with your stuffie and favorite blankie by twenty.”

Ezra frowned. “I like to have a good time. But name _one time_ in the last two weeks that we’ve had a chance.”

Sabine didn’t reply, a silent concession. Instead, she shrugged. “That is exactly my point. This looks like a good time.”

Ezra regarded the bar soberly. “This looks like a dive.”

She motioned. “Come on, wet blanket. It’ll be fun.”

The inside was crowded with people and blasting music, but they found a table in the corner and ordered. It had only one small booth seat for the two of them to squish together in and no chairs on the opposite side. While they waited for their drinks, they chatted over a basket of steaming flatbread and dips. Their drinks arrived, both local selections, which was a tradition the two had whenever they were on-planet anywhere long enough to try local fare. Sabine always chose hard liquor, while Ezra stayed on the safe side with light beer.

“You’re such a wimp,” Sabine declared as she downed half the drink in one go, her arm brushing his in the tight booth.

“You know,” Ezra replied testily, “I don’t really think Jedi are supposed to drink.”

“Pretty sure Obi-Wan got sauced on occasion.”

Ezra leaned back in the booth and crossed his arms, his body moving against hers with the motion. “And how would you know that?”

“Bo-Katan’s sister, the Duchess? They used to…you know.” She made the universal hand motions, and Ezra squinted.

“Okay, filed under ‘things I didn’t need to know and now do.’”

Sabine hefted her drink. “This’ll give you a memory wipe.”

“Try this,” Ezra said, pushing his tall glass toward her. “It has a good aftertaste.”

Sabine took a healthy swig and then made a face, pushing down the temptation to spit the stuff right back into the glass. “Ugh,” she said. “That tastes like water. I’ll be right back.”

She pushed away from the table, ignoring the way her thigh pressed against his – which was distractingly firm – as she got up. Blinking uncomfortable thoughts away, she looked around for the bar and headed for it. She placed an order for a flight of shots and returned to the table, trying unsuccessfully to make space between her and Ezra but failing completely. The booth was too small.

Ezra looked suspicious. “You have this look about you,” he said.

“What look?” Sabine asked innocently.

“Like a loth-cat that just caught a mouse. What did you _do_?”

Right at that moment, their server brought the six shots up to them and set them down. Sabine neatly lined them up.

“Those all for you?” Ezra asked.

“Nope.” She divvied them up. “We’re splitting them.”

“Shots, really? I don’t think I can do shots.”

“Look,” Sabine said. “Kanan and Hera are going to do their thing – ”

“Ugh.”

“All night long – ”

_“Uggggh.”_

“On the ship, so we’re not going back for a few hours at least. We might as well have some fun. I’ll race you.” Sabine brought the first up to her lips, which turned up in a competitive smile. Ezra rolled his eyes and picked up the first of his, never one to pass up a competition.

“Fine,” he said, “but these better be weak.”

“Three, two, one, _go!_ ”

They each drank the shots down, turning the glasses over on the table when they finished. Unsurprisingly, Sabine won, and she laughed as Ezra swallowed and turned over his last glass with a wince. By now, she was thoroughly drunk, and she felt great. Ezra, on the other hand, moaned and pressed his fingers to his temples.

“I don’t feel so good,” he said. “That may have been too much. My mouth is tingling.”

Sabine laughed. Outside, the skies finally opened up and started pouring, the thunder and rain loud enough to reach them inside the noisy bar. Ezra’s eyes shifted toward the closest window, but the bar was too crowded for either of them to even see through it.

“You kids offworlders?” asked a portly older gentleman with white hair, a bushy mustache, and dirty white apron over his paunchy belly. Sabine nodded. “If your ship’s at the spaceport, you won’t be going back there anytime soon. Abindi’s storms’ll keep you here overnight for sure. No one’s leaving.” When Ezra and Sabine exchanged a look, he added, “There’s a small inn down the street, name of Bexley’s. Head there. They’ll put you up for not too much.”

“Thank you,” Ezra said. The man nodded.

“You kids take care, now.” Then he disappeared through the doors to the kitchen in the back corner.

The server brought over a datapad with their bill, and Ezra got to the credits first to pay her – after they’d ordered another round of the delicious flatbread and dips. They didn’t immediately leave, though. They lingered, as they had at dinner, only this time, it wasn’t because they were trying to avoid an awkward situation. It was because they were genuinely enjoying each other’s company – as they always did, but…this time was different. It was probably the alcohol, Sabine reasoned, making things easier, lowering both their inhibitions, and yeah, maybe she was being a little flirtatious, but so what? She didn’t see boys all that often. Practicing on Ezra was harmless (because of course it was just practicing). If she bumped his leg with hers or gently elbowed him, or if he pretended to bury his face in her shoulder in shame over a story she recounted, it was all in good fun. And if her hand came up to pat his head in a joking “there, there,” well, it wasn’t like she was _actually_ stroking her fingers down the side of his face, feeling the softness of his skin only roughened slightly by the stubble on his cheek and jaw at the end of a day. She wasn’t letting her hand drift through too-short hair and wishing it was longer because even in his most irritating days as a kid, his strands had always looked so silky and hey, she admired good hair. It wasn’t that she _actually_ desired to run her own fingers through it. Ezra was a good-looking guy, she could admit that. She was human, after all. It didn’t _mean_ anything.

Did she _want_ it to mean something?

Finally, when the flatbread had been reduced to crumbs and the dips were long gone, they got up to leave. Ezra stumbled back a step.

“Whoa,” he said. “That stuff was really strong. I feel funny.”

Sabine laughed and helped steady him. “Yeah, you’re drunk, Ezra.”

“So are you,” he replied, like she’d insulted him. His cheeks were flushed with the effects of booze, his eyes a little dazed, but he looked relaxed for once, the cares of the universe dropped away from him. He looked… _good_.

“Yeah, I know that,” Sabine said, quickly darting her eyes away and picking up her napkin to drop on her plate – just for something to do. “That’s why I drank so much. Come on. Let’s find that inn.”

The rain immediately soaked them as soon as they got outside. Ezra unzipped his jacket and raised it over both their heads, as if that would help any.

“I can’t see a thing in this storm!” he said, raising his voice to be heard. The entire street had gone dark with oppressive steel-gray clouds, and the rain lashed at them from every direction. They awkwardly stumbled down the sidewalk next to the dirt street, drunk and trying to keep Ezra’s jacket over both of them. Their bodies pressed close together, and the alcohol buzzed pleasantly in Sabine’s mind. Both of them found the situation very funny, and it took them way longer than it should have to find the inn.

Ten soaking wet minutes later, they found it.

The innkeeper at the front desk quirked his lips up when they dragged themselves in, boots squeaking on the floor and Ezra struggling to put his jacket back on. “Caught in the storm, eh, offworlders?”

“Just give us a room,” Sabine said. He chuckled.

The man back at the bar had been right: Bexley’s didn’t charge too terribly much for a room, and the place was neat and clean.

“Only got the one room left, but it’s got a bad door that don’t work right, mind,” the owner said. He pulled a beat-up keycard from beneath the counter. Sabine arched a brow, believing one hundred percent that what the owner said was true. “Shower works, though.”

“Thanks,” Sabine said. Ezra took the card and turned in the wrong direction. She steered him around the right way, toward the shady stairwell in the back corner.

“You kids have fun, now,” the owner said with a smirk.

“Always,” Sabine replied back, and pushed Ezra toward the stairs. “He has nooo idea what kind of _fun_ we get up to.”

“Oh, absolutely not,” Ezra agreed. “Like the time you and Hera nearly got _eaten_ by those fyrnocks on that asteroid.” This set off a cascade of laughter from him as they climbed the old wooden stairs, and Sabine rolled her eyes.

“Yeah,” she deadpanned. “That was hysterical. You know what I actually thought was _super_ funny, though? You swooping in to save the day, and falling on your ass. Then I had to save _you_ from being eaten.”

That stopped his laughs and brought the tinge of pink back to his cheeks, which, in turn, made Sabine chuckle in amusement. Ezra shook his head, the smile back on his face, and they got to the room stuffed back in a dark corner. Ezra swiped the card through the slot, the door beeped, and he shoved the handle down. It beeped again and refused to open. He tried once more.

And kept trying.

“What’s your _problem_?” Sabine hissed, but most of it was laughter as Ezra tried and failed multiple times to get the door open.

“It’s _hard_!” he shot back, but by now even he was shaking with barely contained laughter, and the keycard jiggled in his hand as the laughs rippled over him. “This is the worst door I’ve ever met in my life!”

Finally, with one last, vengeful swipe, Ezra got the door to zip open, and they both tumbled in. The door banged shut behind them, narrowly missing them, Sabine catching Ezra by the shoulders of his jacket. She pushed him up against the door, and they both laughed harder than before. The alcohol clouded Sabine’s mind and made the situation way funnier than it needed to be, even pushing tears into her eyes. It felt good to let go and relax and be silly, after a lifetime of seriousness and fighting for her life. Ezra must’ve felt the same, reaching up his gloved hands to press the heels into his eyes as he laughed.

Suddenly, Sabine realized how very close she was to his face, and, impulsively, she leaned in closer and kissed him. It was too quick to even notice much, and neither of them even broke their laughter.

So she kissed him again.

And again.

Until he stopped laughing.

…and kissed her back. And brought his hands to her waist.

His lips were soft, smooth, tasting of alcohol and rainwater. The quietness of the room struck Sabine then, after how incredibly loud they’d been in the hallway and then immediately upon entering the room. It should’ve been weird – it certainly registered as weird with him, because he whispered her name, but she didn’t respond to it – but it also seemed so…

_Natural._

Part of her recoiled at the idea – it shouldn’t be _natural_ to kiss Ezra Bridger – but the other part of her, the drunk, blazing hot part of her that was totally turned on right now, and kind of had been since the bar – felt that she could kiss him all night, and there was nothing else in the entire universe she would rather be doing.

“I hate wet clothes,” Sabine murmured, not even thinking about the comment.

“Take them off, then,” Ezra replied, but she noted there was no innuendo to it, just a response he _clearly_ hadn’t thought through. Either way, she gave him a snort in return. Because even if he hadn’t thought the comment through before it came out of his mouth, his brain had obviously been _going there_ already. Still, though, he wasn’t wrong; Sabine _hated_ being in wet armor.

“Good idea.” She reached up to unclasp her breastplate and quickly worked her way down, the sound of each piece unclicking more satisfying than the last. “You like wet clothes, Jedi?”

“N-no,” Ezra whispered breathlessly, and she took that as invitation to proceed. She reached for the metal zip on his jacket and began pulling it down, listening to the sound of the teeth parting and his breathing start to pick up.

Abruptly, Sabine stopped. “Wait, where’s your lightsaber?”

The question seemed to jolt Ezra. “In my pocket,” he answered.

“Okay. I’m not going to accidentally activate it, am I?”

“No, it’s locked.”

“It has a lock on it?”

“Of course it has a lock on it.”

The alcohol swirling through Sabine’s clouded mind made his affronted mansplaining giggle-worthy rather than punch-worthy, and she kissed him again, hunching her shoulders up as she pressed her body close to his and renewed her efforts with his jacket. Soon she had it off his shoulders and was wiggling it down his toned arms – it was a tight fit, she noticed with pleasure – and she dropped it on the inn’s hardwood floor with a thunk, sure she’d turned the sleeves inside out.

“That doesn’t mean _drop it_ ,” Ezra muttered, but she detected the playful note in his voice. She smiled as her hands went for the bottom of his shirt, tucked into his belted pants.

“A pretty Mandalorian girl takes your clothes off, and you complain about how she handles your weapons?”

He chuckled appreciatively and kissed her again.

Sabine’s bodysuit proved the hardest to remove, as it was skintight in dry conditions and almost impossible in wet. But they got through it with only one accidental elbow to Ezra’s midsection and no insults from Sabine. She helped him when he needed it, though he mostly did fine on his own, surprisingly – who knew, maybe he’d envisioned this plenty of times and had a gameplan for how he’d do it; that wouldn’t have come as a shock to her – peeling it down and revealing her damp skin bit by bit, fingertips lingering. He was nervous, she could tell, glancing up to see him biting his lower lip as his eyes drifted over her when the suit was at her hips.

“Like what you see?” she quipped, uncomfortable now, feeling exposed. She _was_.

“Yeah,” he replied hoarsely, his voice distant, though, as if he wasn’t really thinking about what she’d asked but just really, truly focusing on her. “A lot.”

It brought a blush to her face, and she found herself then biting her own lip and turning her attention to the suit to struggle with it without his help – anything to distract from the look in his eyes and the tone in his voice. That was when her elbow accidentally jabbed him. While he recovered, she leaned over to remove her boots.

“Oh, you’re shorter without your boots – ” Ezra started, but that earned him her lips to the crook of his neck so fiercely he whined and nearly crumpled to the ground before her. Once she felt suitably vindicated, she kissed slowly down his chest, tasting rainwater along with his skin. The rain here on Abindi tasted sweet, something she’d never encountered before. She badly wanted to peep her eyes open and glimpse him up close – she’d only ever seen him shirtless on the _Ghost_ before and made sure never to stare, despite her growing curiosity – but thought she’d die of embarrassment if he caught her looking now. So instead she had to content herself with feeling his warm skin beneath hers and keeping her eyes closed when she wasn’t at face level with him. His muscles flinched back away from her kisses, and even though she wasn’t looking, she had the distinct impression he was.

She moved back up to his face, splayed hands sliding up his chest as it rapidly rose and fell. Ezra’s hands caught her elbows, gently holding them for a moment until she wound her arms around his neck and pulled herself close to him again. Her stomach pressed up against his, skin to skin, and she pushed up onto her toes to be closer. Ezra wrapped his own arms around her waist, pulling her in for a moment before his hands ran up her back to her shoulders.

“You’re beautiful,” he breathed, and the way he said it, with such reverence, made her duck her head, wet hair swinging forward into her face.

“Stop,” she replied, but the word caught a bit in her throat. She pressed her lips to his again to keep him from saying anything more, tugging him back toward the bed only steps away (the room was indeed tiny). As she lay on surprisingly fluffy pillows, Ezra interlaced their fingers and moved her arms above her head as he leaned down to kiss her neck. It was a surprisingly smooth move from him, one that made Sabine grin and shift restlessly on the bed, because she didn’t expect it and oh, she was _excited_ for this.

“Hey, you um…you sure we…?” he whispered.

She may have been drunk, yes, but this was something she had desired for a year at least. For him, longer. Leaning up to his ear and not so gently closing her teeth around it, feeling a delicious shiver run through him as she did it, she whispered back, “Don’t stop.”

He didn’t.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Don’t worry, I won’t do y’all like that and leave you with a fade-to-black like this. It did end up writing itself into a chapter ending nicely, I thought, but I have some more of the scene in mind, so I’ll flash back to it. I’m not a big fan of fading to black myself – not harshing those who like it, just saying it ain’t my thang – so I am intending on (tastefully) giving you a little more.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The realization the morning after, The Walk of the Shame (the whole inn heard), seeing the crew again, and a new mission before the two have a chance to talk.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 1/10/21: WOW, the response to this has been really incredible! :D Best I've ever gotten, I think!! I am SO glad you guys are liking this!! Fluff and fun makes for a nice change from darkness and angst all the time, eh? Not that that’s not enjoyable, too, but sometimes, you just need something light. 
> 
> So, I tweaked the first chapter, adding in some additional material to the love scene especially. Just expanded it a bit where I felt like it was lacking. Feel free to go back and give it another read! I tried to turn the temperature up a bit more with it.
> 
> Thanks to [PetitMinou](https://archiveofourown.org/users/PetitMinou/pseuds/PetitMinou) for mission help! 💕
> 
> This is a FUN chapter! ENJOY!! 😃 And I will get to responding to the rest of chapter 1 comments soon!! ❤️
> 
> **NOTE 1/11/21** Sorry for the weird formatting when I posted yesterday. I had Track Changes on and then didn’t bother to check the formatting before posting. I’ve fixed it now.

When Sabine woke in the morning, her first thought was that she was pleasantly well-rested, and her bed was way more comfortable than she remembered. She had maybe a solid eight to ten seconds of enjoying this before a pounding headache surged in. Groaning against the sunlight blazing behind gauzy curtains, she pulled the covers over her head.

“Hey! Bed hog.”

…Oh, _shit_.

Sabine’s eyes snapped open and she flipped over toward the center of the bed. Her wide-open eyes met Ezra’s, as big as hers.

“What the fuck!” she yelled, because that was the first thing that came to mind, and it startled him so much that he reflexively jerked backward and toppled out of the bed onto the floor. Sabine groaned again and flopped onto her back, covering her face as the events of last night rushed back to her, the dryness in her mouth and the relentless throbbing in her head reminding her of how much hard alcohol she’d consumed.

Ezra clutching her face between his soft hands, her rain-damp hair hopelessly tangled in his fingers. His breaths. His gasps. The sound of him, hearing him let go. The feel of his skin sliding against hers. The look, _the look_ on his face, and her own fingers curled around his wrists. Those kisses, deep and intense and stealing her breath. The raw power of him, even though he was so gentle (he could never be anything but). And when she turned him over onto his back, the admiration she saw in his eyes, and something else shining there that she didn’t want to identify, and no one could force her to.

It was a strange sort of delirium, the alcohol heightening all the senses of it, the intensity, and she knew she hadn’t acted entirely like herself. She’d touched him _way_ more than she’d ever intended to when she’d started this, but it was like, once she got him in her arms, she couldn’t stop. She wanted to feel, and know, every part of him, and when it was over, when she’d seen something so acutely intimate from him at the end, she felt like she did know him more, and incredibly better, in this whole other, deeper way.

She couldn’t force herself to move afterwards, even though she knew they both should shower. They’d had a full day, traveling, gathering supplies, the rainstorm, and now this. But somehow, the idea of moving, of leaving his arms and the warmth of him, even to wash the day off, just held no appeal. So instead, she found herself falling asleep with him, a total mess from the day, all her makeup on, and not even caring.

Sabine sighed, pressing her fingers into her eyes to block the images out, but wishing, more than that, that she could block the _feelings_.

Then…the words came back. Her voice mostly, but he hadn’t held back, either.

But _her_ …

“Oh, stars…” she muttered.

“I don’t think I’ve ever heard you say my name that many times,” Ezra unhelpfully commented as he climbed back into the bed. Sabine scowled as she jabbed her fingertips into her temples to try to unsuccessfully push the headache away. Her face burned, and if embarrassment were a way to die, she’d have melted into a puddle of lava right there.

“I’m going to hit you,” she growled.

“I couldn’t translate all of the Mando’a – ”

Shooting upright and wincing with instant regret, Sabine sat there for a moment, recovering, before yanking the comforter off and wrapping it around her with as much dignity as she could muster for the situation. Hopping off the bed, she strode over to the heap of clothes by the door – great, still wet! – and began gathering them with one hand.

“I am going to get dressed in the ’fresher,” she said calmly. “When I get out, you had better be decent as well.”

With her head held high, she strode off toward the small room, determined to take the high road here.

“That comforter looks great on you,” Ezra called after her. “Really fetching.”

“You’re an asshole, Ezra Bridger,” she called back, before closing the door.

===

Sabine had hoped that the ’fresher contained a handheld hair dryer, and it did, but it was underpowered and did little to dry her clothes. The bodysuit was fine – it was made of a special material and had dried quickly – but the undergarments were the problem. They were chilly and stuck uncomfortably to her skin. She wanted a hot shower, but more than that, she wanted to get back to the ship – and away from this room, this planet, and this weird memory she had created with Ezra.

When she came out of the ’fresher carrying the comforter, Ezra had only half-accomplished the task of dressing, and sat on the bed in his pants with one boot on, working on the other boot, which seemed to be giving him trouble.

“This material sucks,” he commented, when he must have sensed her staring and judging him for dressing so slowly. “It works great in wet conditions, but not if you take them off, apparently.”

“Uh-huh.”

Sabine didn’t really care about his boots. His clothing choices – most of which she vehemently disagreed with – were of no concern to her. She was, instead, watching his bare upper body. The way it moved as he struggled with the boot, the smooth movements of muscle underneath bare skin…damn.

Shaking her head, Sabine focused on finger-combing her hair. “I thought I said to get dressed.”

“You don’t give me orders,” Ezra replied, finally yanking the boot on. Then he turned a stupidly amazing smile on her that made her stomach flip-flop. “Unless you’re into that.”

He was in an _irritatingly_ good mood. But of course he was. He just got laid, by the girl of his dreams. Sabine growled and curled her hands into fists.

“Look, Ezra – ”

He touched his finger to his ear, the one she’d whispered _Don’t stop_ into last night, and leaned toward her. “What’s that? Sorry, you’re going to have to say my name a little louder.”

Almost seeing red, Sabine said, “You _sha_ – ”

Her comm chirped, and she gratefully turned away. “Spectre Five.”

“Morning,” Hera said brightly, and Sabine made a face. Sounded like _she_ had a great night.

“Morning, Sabine!” Kanan echoed in the background.

_Ugh. Gross._

“Ready for us to head back?” Sabine asked. “I think we’re done sightseeing on Abindi.”

“Sure. Do you want to stop and get breakfast or eat on the ship? That place we ate yesterday was good, so feel free – ”

“No, we’ll eat on the ship,” Sabine hurriedly cut Hera off, not wanting to spend any more time alone with Ezra than necessary. “We should get going. Spectre Five out.”

She ended the call and gathered up her armor while Ezra finished dressing. They silently left the room, but their boots clomped down the wooden stairs to the dining room below…which was full of other guests enjoying breakfast. They were all pretty busy eating, so Sabine hoped they could edge out of there quietly –

“Wellll, good morning to you two crazy kids,” Bexley said loudly with a wide grin as he wiped a caf mug dry. “You have a nice night?”

Feeling like her head was about to split open, and not entirely sure she was _not_ going to throw up on the spot, Sabine immediately jammed her helmet on her head as the guests looked up from their conversations at the newcomers. Ezra offered a lame wave, and she elbowed him in abject horror. Everyone was staring. Everyone _knew_. The _entire place_ had heard them get it on last night.

“Nice job, Ezra!” a man called from the back, raising a fist in manly solidarity. Sabine actually cringed. Her face burned so bad under her helmet, a sensor started beeping.

“Yeah, that’s how you have fun during an Abindi rainstorm, my man!” another guy joined in.

“That one’s a keeper, Ezra!”

“How do they know my na – Oh right,” Ezra said. “Hey, you sure you don’t want breakfast? They have bacon.”

“Let’s just go,” Sabine seethed. “I need to find a place to throw up.”

“Gonna try that Mando’a out on my husband!”

The door closed thankfully behind them. Once they were outside, Ezra groaned at the blinding sunlight, while Sabine privately gloated that her helmet cut the glare. Her mouth still tasted like ashes, her head was a mess, and her stomach heaved.

“How,” she growled, “are you not hungover?”

“Jedi meditations,” Ezra answered.

“There are Jedi meditations for hangovers.”

“Well, no,” he admitted. “But similar stuff.”

“Like what.”

“I don’t know, like bad headaches, and nausea, and the stuff that comes with it.”

“That’s _cheating_.”

“What, you want me to be as miserable as you?”

“Yes. So much.”

They made their way back to the spaceport in silence after that. Sabine made sure to telecast her emotions loud and clear so that Ezra made no mistake in getting the message: she did _not_ want to talk right here, right now, with all these people around.

Back at the ship, Zeb was going through supplies with Chopper. Sabine felt his eyes tracking her.

“Got caught in a rainstorm, Zeb,” she answered the unspoken question tartly. “Not all of us wake up beautiful like you.”

“Right,” Zeb said. “Well, don’t bother Hera and Kanan. They’re _mooning_ over each other.”

Ezra made a face. “Gross.”

“Oh, I got some of those extra gas cartridges you like…”

Sabine left the two chatting about the supplies and went to her room to get fresh clothes, forcing her mind away from last night. On the way there she grabbed a couple painkillers and downed a huge glass of water for her headache. She didn’t allow herself to think until she was locked away in the privacy of the _Ghost_ ’s refresher and her body was under the hot flow of water. A glimpse in the mirror showed her she looked a complete wreck, and she was grateful Hera hadn’t seen her. She looked, one hundred percent, like she’d just had some really intense sex the night before, fallen asleep without getting cleaned up, and done a walk of shame back to her residence the next morning, smeared lashes, liner, and all.

Basically, she looked like exactly what had happened.

Sabine moaned and banged her forehead into the wall, closing her eyes and forcing herself to go over everything.

It wasn’t that she didn’t want it. No, that desire she’d felt when she got inside the room at the inn with Ezra had been building since they’d been stuffed into that small booth together and started drinking.

Well, more fairly, the desire had been building for a year, but…

Not that she wanted Ezra that way.

But not that she hadn’t wanted last night! He hadn’t forced her or anything. No way. She’d started it, after all.

It was just, he was her friend. Her _best_ friend. They would never cross that line.

Except they did. They had. They couldn’t ever go back.

Did she want to go forward?

Well, no, of course not.

Right?

Shit.

Taking a deep breath, Sabine tried to center herself. Okay. Maybe they could just…pretend like this didn’t happen. Go back to the way things were. Reset. People slipped up all the time with things, and the Rebellion was famous for making odd bedfellows. She’d heard her share of the stories. And hey…it was just Ezra.

Right?

As she washed yesterday off her body, her mind drifted back to the details of the night before. It hadn’t hurt, much as she’d expected it to – not that she was afraid of a little pain. He’d worried, though. Of course he had.

_“Am I hurting you? I know…people say…it can hurt…the first time…”_

He was nervous still, his words halting, his own body overwhelmed with sensation and having trouble focusing.

_"No, no, it’s fine…it doesn’t hurt at all…”_

_“Okay…okay… But if it does, just say something, tell me, and we’ll stop. We don’t have to finish.”_

She had let his words hang there for a moment, because while it didn’t _hurt_ , it was…uncomfortable at first. Not in an unpleasant way, just in a really odd, unexpected, different way. But that feeling soon passed, quickly shifting into pleasure. They had the luxury of time that night, the galaxy for once blessing them with something they so rarely got, and they took all of it. Moving slowly, touching slowly, kissing slowly, and she was certain by the end of it that there was not one bit of her he hadn’t caressed or explored.

And it had been so… _good_.

Sabine put her face in her hands. This was a mess. She’d wanted to talk to him before they left, tell him this didn’t need to change anything or make things weird. But they hadn’t had a chance, and once they were out in public, well, _that_ certainly hadn’t been the right time, and now they were aboard a crowded ship and that _certainly_ wasn’t the right time. Plus, the more distance she got from it, the more _embarrassed_ she was, the more her body caught fire at the mere _thought_ of it, and the more difficult she found the idea of actually _talking_ to Ezra about it.

How could she face him again?

Picturing his smug face and imagining punching it helped a bit and made her smile, but her mind also caught on the memory of it – he was… _overly_ smug. Painfully so. Sure, he was no doubt riding the literally euphoric high of losing his virginity to the girl he…whatever he felt for her…but at the same time, he had to wake up feeling as weird as she did about all of it. Knowing there had been zero communication, zero discussion, that had to make him feel as uncomfortable and off-balance as it did her.

One thing she knew for sure, though – no way was he handling this better than she was.

===

By the time Sabine finished getting dressed and ready for the day, they’d already left Abindi. Hera and Kanan were, indeed, mooning about, and she stayed out of their way. It was cute, she supposed, something she never saw from her own parents, but she was not in the mood. Entering the galley for some breakfast and a strong cup of caf, she found an open white bakery box on the table. At the table sat Zeb and a recently showered Ezra, dressed in fresh clothes with his jacket tied around his waist. He looked peaceful, calm, happy…nice. Like he had last night. Even though he’d just showered, his short hair was already dry. Sabine’s fingers itched to run through it again, again making her wish it was longer, so she could twine her fingers in it and clutch him tight to her –

Then Ezra smiled at her, making her traitorous body remember his touch and flame all over again, so she immediately switched her attention to the box as her face warmed. Who knew with those Jedi powers; he could’ve seen right into her dirty thoughts. Both he and Zeb held steaming cups of caf and regarded the item in the box, bright red and heaped high with dense white cream. One piece was already missing.

“It’s a pie, you guys,” Sabine finally said. “You’re looking at it like it’s a naked girl.”

Ezra rewarded her cheeky remark by coloring and trying to hide it with a quick sip of hot caf. Zeb chuckled. “I’ve seen a lot better hairy fems than this pie,” he remarked.

Sabine tiredly got down a bowl, poured in some oats and water, and warmed them up. She stared at the warmer as it buzzed along, trying to keep her mind blank and letting her thoughts slosh over each other like a tidepool. The timer beeped, and she opened the door to pull out her sludgy oats. Grabbing a spoon, the sugar container, and some nutrient milk, she started trying to make something edible out of it.

“What do you think, Ezra?” Zeb asked as she sat at the table. “Hairy or smooth?”

Sabine’s head came up, to find Ezra sputtering out his next drink of caf. “Wh-what?”

“This right ’ere.” Zeb pointed a clawed finger over his shoulder, grimacing. “I got hit with a buckethead’s bolt last week and I dunno if it all grew back right. Is my fur back yet or not? It’s a simple question, kid.”

Blinking, Ezra leaned forward a little bit to get a look. “Uh, yeah, looks pretty good, big guy. Hairy for sure.”

Without meaning to, Sabine snickered, nearly choking on the laughter. Ezra’s eyes darted to her, and the stormy frown on his face was enough to set her off again. He shook his head, his eyes narrowed and his face looking rather irritated.

“Hey, what’s that on your neck, kid?” Zeb leaned forward to look at Ezra, where a reddish mark peeked out a little ways from his shirt by his collar near his shoulder. “You get hit, too?”

“What?” Ezra asked again, craning to look at it as if he could get the right angle.

Sabine’s eyes flared when she saw the mark. That had been her payback for his “You’re shorter without your boots” comment last night, but apparently she’d gotten him a bit too hard.

“Or did you get bitten by something?” Zeb continued.

“Looks more likely,” Sabine said somberly. Ezra looked from Zeb to her, finally catching on and slightly panicked. “You should get that checked out. _Ezra_ _._ ” She put extra emphasis on his name, knowing now that apparently, that was _a thing_ for him. He blushed yet again, and she could almost see his pulse in his neck and read the thoughts in his mind. She tried not to gloat when he shifted uncomfortably in his seat, shook his head at her, and tried to casually cross his arms on the table in front of him like everything was just fine. That’s what he got for being a jerk this morning! And no, she was not admiring his arms in his short-sleeved shirt.

Hera and Kanan entered the galley then, as Sabine got up to pour herself a cup of caf. No cream and sugar this morning. Today called for black fuel. “Oh, you found the pie,” Hera said brightly. “Kanan already had a piece.”

“Mmhm,” the older Jedi replied. “It was damn good.”

Hera cast a fond look at him over her shoulder. “The locals said it couldn’t be missed, so I picked some up.”

“Delicious,” Kanan added.

Sabine crossed her arms, caf mug in one hand. “Ew, guys. We know what you mean.”

The two had the grace to look bashful, at least. Sabine put in another bowl of oats. The warmer beeped, and Sabine turned to get her food. She took the bowl back to the table, sat, and stirred them, then scooped some up, brought them to her mouth, and blew on them. In her periphery, Ezra watched her, still working at his own cup of caf.

“So, did you have some fun last night?” Hera asked. Sabine immediately choked on the bite she’d put in her mouth, and Ezra coughed out his caf. Zeb thwacked his back a few times.

“No,” Ezra said, as Sabine replied, “We got a hotel.”

“Oooh, sleazy,” Zeb commented. Sabine glared at him and viciously stirred her oats.

“It was an inn, you dolt,” she said. “Very clean, no bugs.”

“Could’ve been a lot worse,” Ezra said, glancing at Sabine again. She forced herself to keep her head down. He was as unsubtle as an E-Web.

“It sounds bad enough,” Zeb replied. “You two stuck in a room all night. I’m just glad I wasn’t there.”

“So were we.”

Sabine ground her teeth. Hera looked at her sidelong.

“I was asking Zeb,” she said slowly, which made Sabine’s cheeks burn. She twisted her spoon in her sludgy oats. “Guess you guys were up to some sort of _fun_ I shouldn’t be asking about,” she continued with a note of warning in her voice. “I hope you didn’t break any laws.”

“We didn’t break any laws!” Ezra exclaimed. Sabine didn’t dare look up at him. She prayed no one could see her face. “When did you guys get so nosy?” He took a loud slurp of caf, and Zeb gave him a confused look, jaw halfway open.

“What’s eating you?” the Lasat asked. “You’re acting completely loony.”

“Too much fresh air, clearly,” Hera said. “Anyway, I came in here to tell you all we have a mission to prep for. Command picked up some Imperial patrols and chatter in the sector and wants us to check them out, so we’ll be doing some sneaky work here soon. Break’s over. Let’s gear up and get going.”

Zeb stood and stretched, all manner of internal bits cracking and popping. “Sounds good, Hera.”

He lumbered off toward the crew cabins, and Sabine hurriedly shoveled the rest of her breakfast into her mouth. She and Ezra _definitely_ needed to talk, but now was _definitely_ not the time.

“Gotta go!” she excused herself around a full mouth of cold oats, getting up and dumping her bowl, spoon, and mug in the sink.

“Wait, Sabine – ” Ezra started, but she was already through the hatchway, and the door was closing shut behind her.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ezra and Sabine try to talk and end up having the stupidest fight in the universe. Things are sorta worked out? Kinda? Maybe, maybe not.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 2/3/21: Sorry it took me awhile to update. After the literal insurrection at the Capitol, the fun just drained right out of me. Even though Biden is FINALLY in the White House THANK GOD, it’s still hard for me to work on this piece after what happened a month ago. But I’m trying, so…here you go. Peace. ❤️

Command was right: something suspicious was indeed going on in this sector. A patrol of TIE fighters came out to investigate as soon as they entered the airspace of the closest planet.

“All right, let’s dust these guys and then get down to the planet,” Hera ordered. “We’ll go in on the dark side and see what we can find.”

The crew checked in from the guns and got to work.

“Ahhh, just missed it.”

“Over to the right, point three.”

“Shavit!”

“You’ve almost got it, just a little…yes! Nice shot, Zeb.”

“Of course _Zeb_ gets the compliment – ”

“Less whining, Ezra.”

“Hera, you mind lining up some better shots here?”

“I wouldn’t have to if you could shoot better, Kanan.”

“Oooh, _ouuuch_ – ”

“Ezra, dammit, you missed another one.”

“Sorry, Sabine – ”

“Coming right at you, and if you don’t get it this time – ”

“I’ll get him, I promise – ”

“How do you know it’s a him? Women are perfectly competent fliers. Maybe that’s why you can’t hit _her_.”

“Children, enough.”

“Almost…almost… I am _so close_ …”

“Yeah, I’ll bet.”

“What’s that, Sabine?”

“Nothing, just think you’d be finished by now.”

“What the f – ”

_“CHILDREN. WE ARE IN THE MIDDLE OF BATTLE.”_

“Wait, I don’t think they’re talking about TIE fighters, Hera – ”

“Zeb, shut up!” both Ezra and Sabine interjected.

“Bad enough we usually have Hera and Kanan trading insults, now we have Sabine and Ezra,” Zeb grumbled as his cannons spat out fire in the background. “What kind of rain was on that planet anyway? Hormone rain? You two get wet with estrogen and testosterone?”

“No one is wet with anything,” Ezra growled through clenched teeth. “Hera, I really can’t get an angle on this guy.”

“I still say it’s a girl and you can’t get an angle on _her_ ,” Sabine said. “Maybe you’re trying too hard.”

“You would know,” he returned sourly.

“I’m in this conversation and I don’t like it,” Zeb said. “Please let me out.”

The last TIE fighter finally exploded, with a cheer from Ezra. “That’s it,” Hera said. “Now let’s get down to the planet and check it out.”

===

“Hey. Sabine. Wait up.”

Sabine winced as bootsteps caught up to her on her way to the _Phantom II_. She didn’t slow her pace – in fact, she increased it – hoping she could get to the little shuttle before Ezra got to her, and hoping even more that Kanan or Zeb was already there and thus, she wouldn’t have to talk to Ezra alone. She wasn’t ready to do that quite yet.

“Hey, wait.”

Taking her arm, Ezra gently pulled her to a stop. She darted a glance around the accessway. No luck; they were alone.

“Why do you do that?” he asked. He looked pretty mad, or as mad as he ever got anymore, being a Jedi and all that.

“Do what?” she replied, already bristling. When he was tense, _she_ was tense.

“I don’t know, publicly humiliate me?”

Sabine rolled her eyes. “Relax, Ezra. No one knew what we were talking about.”

He lowered his voice. “Is this about what happened last night?”

Just the mere mention of it made her face warm and her body light up. “No,” she said, but the word was utterly unconvincing.

“Sabine – ”

Before he could say anything more, Zeb’s heavy footsteps came up the accessway. The two sprang apart then continued their walk toward the _Phantom II_. Kanan waited there, already strapped in and, presumably, meditating. Ezra sat in one of the seats in the back. Zeb joined them shortly after.

Strapping in, Ezra said mildly, “Maybe you should talk about what’s on your mind, Sabine. Seems like you’re a little _distracted_ by something. Not good to have your mind someplace else going into a mission.”

Kanan immediately perked up. “Everything okay?”

She colored right away, cheeks warm and uncomfortable. Ezra was getting her back. “Yes,” she replied as she headed toward the pilot’s seat. “Why wouldn’t it be?”

“I don’t know, I’m picking up on something really off in your sense,” Ezra said seriously. “Kanan?”

Oh, _kriff._ Now he was bringing Kanan into it?

“Hmm,” Kanan said. “Ezra’s right, Sabine. You – ”

Sabine whirled in the chair to see them both staring at her. “Get your freaky powers off me, you two!” she snapped.

“Maybe you wouldn’t have anything freaky on you if you hadn’t invited it,” Ezra said drily, at which point she saw red, grit her teeth, and turned back around.

Fine. He won this round. She launched the ship ungracefully, earning complaints from the rest of the crew, and descended toward the planet fast enough that she hoped they all threw up on themselves when they hit atmosphere.

===

As Hera had said, they would be investigating the night side of the planet to maintain their cover. Sabine always hated when there was a disparity in ship’s time and planet time like this. It wasn’t even noon ship’s time, and yet here on the planet, it was past midnight. It felt so weird. It threw her off balance every time. She never truly got used to it.

Right now was not a good time for her to be off balance.

Chopper had stayed back on the _Ghost_ , so the four traveled toward what they hoped wasn’t an Imperial base.

“I’m thinking our luck isn’t going to hold out tonight,” Kanan said as they crouched in the shadows behind a rocky outcropping and watched the dark structure.

“Sounds like you got plenty lucky last night,” Zeb, next to Sabine, muttered. She snorted in appreciation.

“What was that, Zeb?” Kanan asked.

“Nothing. Just remarking on the stellar run of luck we’ve had in the past.”

“Right. My point is, that is looking more and more like an Imperial base the closer we get.”

Ezra, on Sabine’s other side and leaning over the rocks on his stomach, shifted restlessly as he looked through a pair of macrobinoculars. She wished he’d stop being jittery. His body kept brushing against hers, and she didn’t like it. She also didn’t like how his shirt had come untucked, and his jacket hiked up, and she could see a bit of his skin peeking out. It was indecent, really. Totally inappropriate for a mission. Completely.

“I say we blow it up,” Ezra put in.

“Literally nobody asked for your input,” Sabine replied. She flicked his hip with her middle finger, wishing he’d stop jiggling. “Stop it. You’re making me nervous.”

He did, lowering the binoculars and looking down at her with a frown. In the dark, with the moonlight behind him, he looked very serious. Sabine quickly pulled her gaze away.

“We’ll stay here,” Kanan continued. “Monitor from a distance and cover you. You two go on up ahead and check it out up close.”

“Yes, sir,” Sabine said, mentally running through the explosives she’d brought with her. Should be enough to do some decent damage. Gently, so as not to cause any of the dangerous materiel to rub against itself, she hoisted her pack.

A flock of large, dark birds flapped overhead as she and Ezra crept away from the outcropping closer to the base and into another set of shadows. They stayed silent as they moved, working seamlessly together as they had for so long. The air on the planet, whatever its name was, was crisp and clear. It was too dark to make out many features, but they appeared to be in something of a canyon, with walls of rock rising up high on either side of them and this base, or whatever it happened to be, nestled comfortably between them. Scraggly trees and bushes dotted the dry landscape. It didn’t seem to be a particularly pretty planet, and Sabine wasn’t sad to miss seeing it in the daytime.

She and Ezra made it to another outcropping much closer to the building and hunkered down. He raised the binocs again, and she lowered her own on her helmet.

“Yup,” Ezra confirmed. “Definitely Imperial. Stormtroopers crawling around it. Shoot.”

“So much for Abindi being far removed from the Empire,” Sabine remarked.

“Yeah. But we can take this base down, at least.”

Sabine thought again about what she’d brought with her, considering. “Maybe.”

They continued spying on the base, pressed tight together behind the rocks. Ezra didn’t usually crowd her, Sabine realized; this was new. She could feel every time he shifted, every time he took a deep breath. His elbow bumped her as he rested it on top of the rock to stabilize his hands as they held the binocs; his hip lined up with hers as they watched the base together. All of this was new. He knew, very well, that Sabine was a loner and needed her space. Now, though, he was getting very much up in it.

She thought about saying something. A few times, she opened her mouth to do just that. But…

But…

…it didn’t make her uncomfortable.

She didn’t…necessarily… _mind it_.

It reminded her of being in his arms last night. Not the worst place she’d ever been in her life. Actually more like one of the best. If someone forced her to be honest with herself, she’d liked it quite a bit. And she wasn’t talking about the sex part, but the being-in-his-arms part.

Blech. What had happened to her??

Ezra was anxious. That she _did_ mind. Because he was restless and twitchy and couldn’t seem to settle, like a giant untamed puppy that was only halfway through obedience school and wandering through the home knocking stuff off the shelves with its overlarge tail. She needed him to _stop_.

“Why don’t you sit there?” Sabine said abruptly, pointing to the ground next to the wall. “You’re making me nervous.”

“Me?” Ezra asked, brows rising. “ _I’m_ making you nervous?”

Sabine mirrored his expression. “Who else would I be talking to?”

His gaze slipped away, and he reached up in his telltale gesture to rub the back of his neck. “No, I just… I’m a Jedi. I’m supposed to make people calm.”

Without meaning to, Sabine laughed and crossed her arms. “Ezra, you’re the opposite of calm right now. You’re like a little hamster on a wheel. Go sit down, please.”

He clearly didn’t appreciate the comparison and narrowed his eyes at her, but he stepped away, went over to the wall, and put one boot up on it as he leaned back. With apparently nothing better to do, he unhooked his lightsaber and ran his fingers over the pommel, staring down at it.

“Hera probably wants us to take care of this sooner rather than later,” he said.

“What time is it?” Sabine asked.

“A little after oh-one-hundred.”

“Okay. They’re not due to change shifts for a bit. We’re going to have to wait it out.”

Ezra flexed his hand and curled it into a fist. “Why? We could probably take them all out.”

Sabine rolled her eyes at the bravado. He hadn’t been like this in years, since before he’d gotten the awful haircut.

“Ezra, be reasonable. We don’t know how many are in there. We need to wait. Reconnoiter. Do our jobs. Remember?”

“Oh, right. That.”

She let out an intentionally irritated sigh. “It’s like you left your brain back in the hotel room,” she muttered as she knelt down to go through her pack. She started pulling items out, sorting the explosives into piles. Ezra knelt down beside her to help, his hand brushing hers when he reached into the pack at the same time she did. Sabine realized what she’d said, and sharp regret plunged through her. Swallowing hard, she continued what she was doing, trying to act normal, hoping he –

“Yeah, about that,” he said, and it took everything she had in her to keep her face blank. She knew she was holding her breath. “Last night was really great.”

The breath came out, all at once, in what sounded like an irritated huff, even though that wasn’t how Sabine meant it. In her periphery she saw Ezra stiffen, his movements stopping, and she looked up at him, feeling terrible for her reaction. His confidence dropped away instantly. Hurt was written all over his face. His brows were drawn together, and he looked rather on the verge of losing it. She had known he wouldn’t take what had happened as well as she had, not without a full discussion and clear indication of where they stood with one another, but she’d had no idea he was this… _distraught_ …over it. Feeling overly vulnerable, Sabine clasped her elbows in her hands.

“Ezra – ” she started, but he immediately pulled away and stood, his demeanor changing in an instant.

“Look, I’m, um…I’m feeling really weird about what happened, okay?” he said. “I’ve been thinking about it a lot, and I get that you’re, I don’t know, whatever you are with feelings, but I really need you to just _talk_ to me about this, not leave me hanging like you have been this whole time.”

“Okay. Okay. I’m sorry. I’ve been busy.”

“That’s banthashit,” he returned, and she knew it was, too. “You’ve been avoiding me. It’s like you’re – ” He stopped, and she waited a moment, his throat working as he swallowed before speaking again. “Like you’re embarrassed that you slept with me.”

Sabine dropped her arms and rolled her eyes, letting out an intentional sound of annoyance this time. “That’s not it, Ezra.”

“No? Then what’s with all the infantile digs at me? ‘Just think you’d be finished by now.’ Whatever, it lasted plenty long enough.”

Sabine’s eyebrows rose along with both her temper and her amusement, and she crossed her arms again. “Should I let the Empire know you want that on your Wanted posters? ‘Ezra Bridger: Lasts Plenty Long Enough.’ ”

She got him there, and even in the darkness, she saw his face burst into flames. She couldn’t stop the satisfied smirk that crossed her own face, and she cocked her hip, daring him to fire back at her. He didn’t, instead narrowing his eyes and staring her down.

“I am allowed,” he started slowly, as if quoting from a self-help book, “to say I am confused.” Then, ticking items off on his gloved fingers, “You have never sent me any signals. You have never flirted with me, either verbally or physically. You have never – ”

Sabine held her hand up. “Sorry, what’s physical flirtation?”

“I don’t know, like accidentally letting me see you in your underwear.”

Now she narrowed her eyes and tilted her head. “Where did you hear… Is that like…is that _normal_?”

Ezra shrugged. “Well, yeah. Isn’t it? Or like, leaving bras around and stuff. The lacy ones.”

“You think I own lacy bras?”

“I mean, it’s crossed my mind – ”

“Or that I would leave them around for _Kanan and Zeb and Chopper_ to find?”

Ezra waved his hands at her. “Okay, all of that is beside the point. The point is, I didn’t…I didn’t expect last night to happen.”

Sabine shrugged, trying to brush it off, even though she still had the same uncomfortable feelings he did. But as weird as she felt about it, talking about it almost felt weirder. “Neither did I.”

The irritation from earlier disappeared, and the nervous Ezra reappeared. He knit his fingers together in front of his body, something she hadn’t ever seen him do.

“I just…don’t really know what to do with it,” he said. “Or where to go from here. I’ve tried to respect your feelings and your wishes, and that was just…really sort of out of left field, and I never in a thousand years… I mean, I’m not saying I didn’t want it, too, because I did, but…” Finally he dropped his head and fiddled with his wrist comm. “I’m just confused.”

Sabine took a deep breath, calmed her mind, and let the breath out. “Yeah, me, too,” she said. But before she could say any more, Ezra jumped in again.

“I’m just really afraid you’re going to say it was some huge mistake,” he said quickly. “That you regret it.”

She shook her head. “I don’t regret it. I know we were drunk, but it’s not something I did lightly. I thought about it. I was very conscious and aware of what I was doing.”

Ezra nodded. “Okay, good. Me, too.” He paused, perhaps thinking. “You didn’t say you don’t think it was a mistake.”

True, she hadn’t. Come to think of it, Sabine wasn’t sure. She looked down at the ground and rubbed her forehead, thoughts careening. “I’m…not sure,” she finally allowed.

“Can you make a mistake you don’t regret?”

“Yes, I think you can.”

He nodded again. “Okay.”

Sabine didn’t say anything, and neither did he. He seemed to consider the conversation over, consider that that was her answer. But it wasn’t, truly. She just didn’t know how she felt about all of this.

“Ezra, I’m not saying it was a mistake,” Sabine said. “I don’t think it was. But I also don’t know where we go from here.”

He caught her eye, and he took a breath, held it for a moment, and let it out. She saw the question there – _Do you want to be with me?_ – and saw it flow out along with the quiet breath.

He wasn’t going to ask.

She was glad. Grateful. A weight lifted off her chest.

Because she honestly wasn’t sure that she could answer.

**Author's Note:**

> I'm on tumblr @lothcatlovesysalamiri.


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